Tuesday, May 31, 2011

pre-baby opinions

i'm more writing this post for myself because i know how drastically my choices/opinions are going to change after actually going through having a baby! but i'd like to look back at these and compare them to what actually happens and what choices i actually make! because i'm in the baby "business", i come into this mommy-hood thing with a ton of preconceived ideas on how i would like things to be-- but i know how much actually being a mom will probably change things. so those who read this, please take my opinions with a grain of salt, knowing that i am not a mother yet and i have no experience being one! i'm not sure what topics will be a big deal to me in the future and which ones will, but i'm going to try my best to pick the bigger topics.

1. breast vs. formula

as of now, i will try with everything in me to be able to breast-feed. ideally, i would love to just breast-feed and only have to pump while i am at work. although i know it definitely is a two person decision-- me and the baby-- and i really only have control over me. my goal is to breastfeed as soon as possibly after the baby is born-- hopefully within 30 minutes.

2. sleeping in my room vs. sleeping in crib

the plan as of now is to have the baby sleep in a bassinette or co-sleeper on my side of the bed while they are little and i am not working. so this would roughly translate to the first 3 months of their lives. after that, i plan to move them just a few feet away into their room and nurse in the rocker in their room. my feeling is that it will be quicker and easier to have them within arms reach if i am nursing them. my only hitch in the plan is getting up to change their diapers if they wear cloth because i will have to rinse them out in the bathroom. we'll see how that works.

3. baby-wearing vs. strollers

i plan to do a little of both. i hope to get a moby to use while they are in their first months. i can see myself wearing this around the house while doing laundry, dishes, cleaning up, etc. as well as possibly while doing christmas shopping! i also hope to get either the ergo or the pikkolo to use as he or she gets older and heavier! i've heard great things about both of these carriers and hope that they can be versatile enough to get us until he/she is around 2.

as for strollers, they definitely have their place in my opinion. i plan to use ours a ton as the baby gets heavier and antsier! i have been researching and have definitely come to my favorite stroller. the uppababy. although this one comes with a steep price, the more i research, the more i love it! there are so many accessories that you can add to make it grow with your family. you can add a second "rumble" seat behind the first to accommodate a second child when they are a newborn. you can also add a ride along board in the back if a toddler wants to stand behind and ride while still having two other babies in the front and rumble seats!

i'll be interested to see how much i carry my baby vs. use the stroller. since our little one will be born close to winter, i wonder if carrying will win out in the beginning? or if having a coat will make me want to have the stroller to use to carry that!

4. will i be a germaphobe?

my guess is no. i currently am pretty nonchalant about most germy stuff because i feel like i am exposed to so much at work. i also really believe in building my child's immune system by being exposed to small things and by breastfeeding. i'm pretty sure that i won't lock myself away for the first 6 or 8 weeks because i know that during that time is thanksgiving and christmas. i know that i want to go holiday shopping and i'm pretty sure we are going to traveling for thanksgiving. all in all, i really don't want to make a huge deal out of germs because in the end, i just don't want to be that kind of parent. i hope to be relaxed and chill about things and hope that then transfers to my child. there are certain things to stress about because they are so important (breastfeeding, safety etc.) but i just feel like this isn't one of them. although i will take normal precautions and have people wash hands or use disinfectant the first time they hold him/her or when necessary.

5. cloth vs. disposable diapers

i am 90% decided on this one. i'm pretty sure that we will use cloth diapers. the part that makes me hesitate are those first couple weeks when things are going to be such a blur. i just can't see myself dragging all the diapers down to the basement every day to wash them. so-- the plan is disposable until i feel comfortable starting cloth. whether that means 2 weeks or 2 months, i'm okay with either. i just want to make sure we get our moneys worth out of our cloth diapers. both aaron and i feel pretty strongly that for us, cloth diapers are best. they are better for the baby, SO much better for the environment (aaron's big reason), and in the end if we use them exclusively til baby is around 2, they will be much cheaper. we plan on using a mix of mostly grovia diapers- both all in ones and hybrids, and also some bum genius elemental diapers. i have been researching and i think that we will use rockin' green diaper detergent. i am kind of nervous about our washer and dryer doing a good job because they are pretty old but we'll see what happens!

anyone with recommendations about cloth diapers-- i'd love to hear them!!

6. natural vs. epidural

okay this is definitely the one that i am getting the most resistance against from those around me. it's really a long, long drawn out reason. but i'll shorten it to the MAIN reason why i want to do natural childbirth-- because i want to and i know that i can. it just seems right for me and my body. in the end it really doesn't have much to do with the baby because i want a healthy baby no matter what- whether that means an emergency c-section or an epidural, i am always going to be for that FIRST. i know that things can change in a second in this process, and i know that my wish for a natural childbirth means nothing in comparison to a healthy happy baby.

so that's it. i will do anything to help myself deliver naturally if that is medically possible. whether that means push a little against the norm, or even hiring a doula, i am going to do that. my goal is to labor as long as possible at home. i live 15 minutes away from where i am delivering, so my goal is to not even think about going to the hospital until my contractions are at around 3 minutes apart. ideally, i'd love to have a couple of my closest friends and family at my house during my early labor. i personally think that labor is a beautiful, magical process and anyone who i'm close to that wants to be a part of it, i'm game. when i do get to the hospital, i'd like to be able to walk around in my room, use a jacuzzi, the shower and a birthing ball to help me through my labor. i know that a lot of labor nurses aren't the most comfortable with natural labor, and i totally understand that. i'm not trying to be an inconvenience to anyone. i'm just trying to do what i feel is right for my body.

those are my goals. if i need to be induced because i am really late or if i'm not having regular contractions and my water has broken, i am okay with pitocin. but with the knowledge that it will only make things harder on myself because my contractions will be so much stronger.

at any point if i feel that i want an epidural and i feel that is the best choice for me, i will get one, no problem. i just know that right now i want to set myself up to have the best chance at delivering natural.

woah.. i could go on for hours. childbirth is probably one of my favorite topics... and i would possibly like to be a doula or even midwife sometime later in life. so seriously, i could go on forever.

i'm thinking that's it for the topics. i might add a few later if i think of them. but i'm glad i got this all out on the computer so i can look at it later.

1 comment:

  1. First of all congrats!!! Second of all I love your blog, and thirdly I'm pretty sure we are the same person - every single one of your thoughts and goals for motherhood were/are the same as mine. I had a natural childbirth (that was my goal but I wasn't going to be crazy about it, it just worked out), I breastfeed at home and pump only at work, we have the uppababy (LOVE!), but I just as often wear Matilda in the ergo or moby, and she's 100% cloth diapered. So it's all possible :) and wonderful and amazing!! Let me know if you have any questions about diapers, strollers, anything - I love to talk baby!